Can You Be Happy For No Reason?
I caught myself doing it again the other day. I was doing some blog stalking, and as I was scrolling through one of my favourite sites I was thinking, “I will be so happy when I can …”
Just when you think you’ve got those buggers tamed, the naughty mind monkeys start playing up again. I thought I had cured my long-standing case of the “when I haves”, but apparently I still have some work to do.
Back in the day I always envisioned that life would be amazing in the future. I may have had a wonderful job, a great boyfriend, somewhere nice to live, and awesome friends and family – but I always wanted more. I thought that life would be better if only I could get that promotion, or afford that designer handbag, or lose enough weight to look like a Victoria’s Secret model. However, as soon as the “when I haves” became the “I haves”, I was still not satisfied. I would always find something else to keep my desire list long and my contentment unfulfilled.
Can you relate?
Of course you can. All of us, at some stage, have pinned our happiness on a not-yet-realised future outcome. We allow thoughts of “When I have” to pull us out of the present moment and into a place where anxiety and fears run rampant. Plus, while it is great to be excited about the future, this often means that we tell ourselves that we’re unhappy with where we are in the present.
How can we stop idolising the future and start being content with the now?
+ Count Your Blessings:
Start a gratitude journal, or simply start and end each day by mentally listing at least 10 things you have in your life to be grateful for. Not only does the Universe reward grateful people, giving us more things to be grateful for, but showing gratitude is a great way of telling yourself that you are happy with whatever you have in your life in that moment.
+ Know That You Are Exactly Where You Need To Be:
Everything about the present moment is absolutely perfect. It may not be wrapped up in the perfect paper with a perfect bow on top, but everything is just as it is supposed to be for you and everyone around you. Think about how everything you have experienced in your life has led you to where you are at the moment. Now understand that whatever is happening in your life right now is happening because it is a necessary step in your journey.
+ Trust That The Universe Has Your Back:
There is something going on that is far bigger than you or I could ever explain. Our lives are all part of a much bigger universal scheme – but the good news is that when we play along nicely, things will always work out in our favour in the end. Trust that. One of my favourite spiritual teachers, Gabrielle Bernstein, explains this perfectly:
“The Universe is a constant flow of energy, always creating, always supporting and always attracting. The same energy that makes the planets revolve around the sun also lives inside you. This energy is vibrating through you at all times. When you are vibrating with fear, the energy of the Universe is attracting more fearful outcomes to you. When you are vibrating from a place of faith, you are guided to outcomes that are in alignment with the calm state that faith provides.”
The best way to connect and collaborate with the Universe is through meditation. For me, meditation is the number one tool that allows me to be happy with my life exactly the way it is. When you’re sitting in stillness and meditating, there is nothing to do besides sit in your own company. There is nothing to achieve, nothing to judge, and nothing to distract you. When you uphold a consistent meditation practice, that calm satisfaction will subtly seep out into other areas of your life too.
Just writing this post has helped me to appreciate the perfection of my life at the moment. I may not have everything I want to achieve in life right this second, but if I did the rest of my life would be pretty boring. I read this awesome quote by Albert Einstein the other day in Danielle LaPorte’s Fire Starter Sessions book:
“The only reason for time is so that everything doesn’t happen at once.”
Your dreams will come true, and my dreams will come true – they are just spread out over time to keep things fun and interesting.
Do you have a case of the “when I haves”? What steps do you take to pull yourself out of them?
Positive affirmation for the day: I choose to be happy.
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